Madonna Tickets are on sale now for her tour, cheapest ones £80, dearest £180 - I think that's value for money to see an old slapper mime 15 songs. Kets hope there's a sniper in the front row.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

I've paid a lot for tickets, but never that much. Most of the gigs I go to only cost £10, and they're excellent. For £80 I'd expect a lot more than live music.

My current car cost a tad more than her most expensive tickets.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

for that much you'd expect to bring away a limb with you from her own personal body
Its insane, all that 'i want to sing to bring my message to the world and make it a better place' shit is just another po star sob act- she really means 'i want to be a pop star so i can lots of money and have everything better than you '

we are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars

I seem to recall that she did an erotic thriller film last decade that I found neither erotic or thrilling. The only saving grace was that she wasn't Pamela Anderson. I had to go into councilling after seeing Barb Wire, and trolls don't normally do the touchy feely stuff.

There's names for women who take their clothes off and have sex with people for money, and making sure you're on screen as well just makes it worse.

There's names for women who take their clothes off and have sex with people for money

Yep. They're called girlfriends.

So I take it you don't see why you should be the lone breadwinner of your household?

Hasn't that damm sniper turned up yet? Madonna's wretched tour has finally reached Cardiff. so that means local TV and radio stations are full of adverts. The worst ones are the radio adverts because they dragged her on to drum up interest in the concert.

Inviting people to rifle through her underwear drawer was pretty gross. The rubber safety undergarments incontinents like her have to wear just isn't the same as the stuff she wore last century. And she threatened to spank anybody who didn't turn up - an empty threat in view of her arthritis...